It's funny how life can change so much in as little as one year. As I say goodbye to 2004 today, all these memories, good and bad, play like a slideshow in the inner crevices of my mind. I've done and said a lot of stupid things, but there are moments when I have shined... always take the time to reflect what you have done this past year (or day, or week, or even hour), and see if you've learned anything. Like me, I'm sure you have.

Happy 2005.

...I have a secret...I've grown so fond of you....

Hi everyone... :)

Ugh, today I got home, and I was so ravenous! Mmm, ice cream cake is good... so are Honey Nut Cheerios XD Gah, I'm so retarded.

Hi all! I hope everyone had a merry Christmas... and next up: Happy New Year 2005 =)

I spent the past week in Orlando, FL. Tiff (my cool sister) and I rode all these cool roller coasters at Universal... I think I must have screamed enough to last a lifetime (and felt my stomach flip about 10x) ... what an experience! We rode Dueling Dragons, this ride where your feet dangle and you go all over the place, three times... and of course, we braved the Hulk ride. "AHHHHH I'M SCARED." We pigged out on cinnamon churros (yum! but expensive), and we discovered the wonders of the restaurant known as Steak and Shake (yum...I had a huge white chocolate milkshake) ... yes, holidays are the time for good eating :) I hope I didn't gain any weight ._. I don't need it...

I got a red sweater, a red shirt from Tommy Hilfiger, a Disney shirt, and a blue shirt (yes, my yearly purchase of clothing, lol... okay, fine, quarterly) :)

So she said what's the problem baby
What's the problem
I don't know
Well maybe I'm in love
Think about it every timeI think about it
Can't stop thinking 'bout it
How much longer will it take to cure this
Just to cure it cause I can't ignore it if it's love
Makes me wanna turn around and face me but I don't know nothing 'bout love
-Counting Crows "Accidentally in Love"

I went to McDonald's with my friend Zee today. Although we ate, we still had this strange craving for more food... so guess what, we purchased more food! Although if you look at the big picture, I didn't have THAT MUCH, but when I got home, I felt so sick... so I had to take a walk to walk off all that loving McDonald's food. I spent an hour contemplating the mysteries of life while my face became wizened and dry due to the cold. It doesn't feel like Christmas yet!

And I don't feel 17 yet.

(My birthday was Monday.)

Well, I'm trying to convert the pages on my site to PHP (because the popups get a little annoying, I think), so excuse the dust and shambles of my pages. But not like anyone comes here, right? ;D

However long I stay
I will always love you
Whatever words I say
I will always love you

-311 "Love Song"

Today, I went to try out for District Band, whoohoo. Unlike the past four years, I went out of the judge room rather confidently. I do believe that out of the last four years, I've stormed out of the room crying and/or complaining about what a horrible flute player I am. The two male judges (that's a first!) were very nice and complimentary of me albeit my cold (achoo!) and my random "blah" notes. Do re mi fa so la si *BLAH* :) I hope I got a decent chair...

We also toured around the Walmart, the place where life centers around in the city I went to audition. That's weird how if a Walmart sits in the middle of nowhere, a town builds around it! A rather scary monopoly... I wonder if Toys R Us and all those retail stores out there will eventually go bankrupt due to Walmart's low prices and its variety of merchandise. Yeesh. I'm not one of those people who can go to Walmart at 3AM for no reason... at least, I don't think. I'm not allowed to be outside of the house past 12AM anyway (city curfew) :)

I worked on Christmas presents and cards. Giving out stuff is so hard, especially with lack of time/money. I took precious time out of studying ... yes, shut up, I do need to study for stuff. I'm really worried about this AP Chem test on Monday because these last couple of days have been rather hazy for me. I've been so sleepy and annoyed with school! Haven't you?

Aww, I'm always missing someone...

Quick entry before I have to depart to the wonderful, exuberant world of studying. I'm a permanent denizen of that world now.

Saturday, I took the SAT - I don't think I did that well, so please don't inquire of my score when the scores come out December 15th... But to go to more happier subjects, I went to Shivani's sweet 16th birthday that evening. She invited the whole brown town (hehe) and of course, us Chinese people (in other words, everyone). Chinatown was reunited :) I miss Melissa so much (our fellow member who turned "traitor" but against her will) ... it was nice hanging out with close friends and getting to know some certain people better. Of course, the alternative to a hot, stuffy house with way too many people is hanging out in the bitter cold!

It's amazing what a dearth of nice, considerate people we have in this world. I recently discovered one of these endangered peoples on Saturday (or merely reinforced my idea of him, anyway). WOW, Dina and I are left impressed by the amazing decency of this one guy. He's the guy that opens doors, that offers his seat when there's nowhere else to sit, that offers the jacket, that follows us in the face of danger, and so on and so forth...not just in one instance, but repeatedly, too! I'm left impressed and with my eyebrow raised in a bemused manner.

I'm trying to read A Beautiful Mind by Sylvia Nasar again. I read it awhile back, but I don't have a great recollection of the book. A mesmerizing movie though. I think I cried when I watched it about 2-3 years ago?

I'm sitting here studying vocabulary now... great, great. Gotta love school. I like how if one goes to school until s/he is about 30 years old (graduate school, etc), that's about 1/3 of their life spent in education. The sacrifices we make to have a good life...I wonder if I can stick with school that long when even now, I'm so sick of it... All right, Danielle, hang in there.

IT'S THE FIRST OF DECEMBER! 12/01/04 and also, my birthday is coming up soon! Can you believe it? This year has gone by rather quickly, but with the exception of last month, I can't really say it was my best year... :( I've had better. What a tumultuous, crazy ride life is. Oh well, like the phrase goes, there's always next year, har har... 2005! I can't wait until 2006.

I love McDonald's yogurt parfaits. :)

And Publix = OVERPRICED >:O I bought three tomatoes for $5.03 today... I was wondering why my overall cost for all of my goods was so expensive. Geez.

I really don't know what to write in here. What I'm feeling right now is rather ineffable - I'm not sure if I'm comfortable writing about it just yet...mere words won't do my feelings justice.

New layout, everyone! Winter 04-05 (yes, the lazy way out of not doing a new layout every month) featuring cute little penguins - I didn't know they were inclined to have couples - and "More Than Words" by Extreme. I love that song, and yes, I am a fan of oldies :)

I went to a birthday/dinner party yesterday. Apparently, everyone loved my complexion because these adults kept on pointing at my face and asking my dad how my face got to be so glowing. I know the reason: my complexion used to be SO bad - oily, zitty, etc. Now that I've gotten the zit problem tamed and am now liberally putting on facial lotion, my complexion is definitely more appealing to the eye... now I don't have to grimace as much when I look in the mirror. :/

I am going to take the SAT I on December 4th (in a week!) and I'm going to do so horribly... I haven't "prepped" for it at all, a.k.a. review some math concepts and maybe go over some vocabulary. Grrr. I don't know what's going on in my life anymore - I need to get myself straightened out ASAP, for December is a busy, busy month.

Lyric O' the Moment: So I'm a little left of center / I'm a little out of tune / Some say I'm paranormal / So I just bend their spoon / Who wants to be ordinary / In a crazy, mixed-up world / I don't care what they're sayin' / As long as I'm your girl -"You Get Me" by Michelle Branch

Hi :) This past weekend was awesome - I love going on debate trips just for the fun of it. I went to judge JV (along with Joy), and it was quite an experience. Since most people who read this probably aren't debaters, I'm not going to delve in the frustration of the rounds because nobody cares... and the people that would have cared, I already blabbed to them about it ^_^' It just sucks when you judge people that you know are better than you - but judges have so much power, it's scary.

Anyway, to make a long story short, I laughed. So. Much. It was utterly ridiculous. The littlest things set me off, and once I start, it's like Pringles: the fun doesn't stop. Thanks to Zach, Nakul, and Brian L. for giving me one heck of a fun time (yes, I equivalate laughing a lot = fun) ... And the thing is, if I tried to tell you what made me laugh so hard, I would be at a loss. Must have been one of those "YOU HAD TO BE THERE!" moments. I tend to get those a lot. It was not necessarily a lot of jokes (good and bad) being spread around although there were some; it was just the humor of people and events, I suppose.

Hmm, well, I guess I never laugh that much at school anymore because of a combination of things:

• the people aren't that funny
• the people don't get me
• I don't get the people
• I'm always tired
• School is a depressing environment.

If you want more details about my trip, I guess you can click to my Xanga, although I do write about friends a lot.

Ooh, I think my dog got bit by a squirrel :( I'm sad, she always looks so down/depressed whenever nobody's tending to her attention needs... everything and everybody needs a little lovin' and carin'.

I put up a new cam picture after like, more than a month. I need to be better about this.

THANKSGIVING BREAK this Wednesday. I'm interested in seeing how my Thanksgiving 04 turns out. =) I need to catch up on many hours of lost sleep, get in touch with some people, shop for Christmas gifts, practice flute for district/all-state, study study study, and do a new layout (winter? who knows) ... this had better be good.

Musical Moment: I am hanging on every word you say / And even if you don't want to speak tonight / That's alright, alright with me / 'Cause I want nothing more than to sit / Outside Heaven's door and listen to you breathing / Is where I want to be -"Breathing" by Lifehouse

Aww, I've been in a slump lately. It may be associated with a monthly thing, it may not. Regardless, I've been moping and groaning and complaining... I'm sure all of my good friends think I'm annoying now. Please, please forgive me ^_^ ... you people mean the world to me :)

I need to start utilizing my cell phone. I have 2000 rollover minutes left. Plus, I rarely call people. There are certain people that I am just dying to call, but sometimes, it's really hard to get the courage to press. the. stupid. call. button. I'm the most silly person on earth...and IM has lost almost all of its personal value, so on the personal level scale...

Face to face > Phone > Letter > E-mail > IM

Or something like that. Feel free to alter the order.

I hate missing school. I am always swamped with makeup work/tests/whatever. Someone shoot me. No, I'm kidding, I embrace life. But seriously, everyday, I'm not happy. Even if there's not a lot of work to do, I'm still not YAYY HAPPY GO LUCKY WHOO! I need to rant to someone. I need to cry. I need someone to hold me. I need to hold someone. I need to write all of my thoughts down properly instead of things like "Today I went to the grocery store..." or something insignificant like this. I need to stop complaining, actually... ^_^

I have a question for you: So when is it love, really? I've been struggling to answer this daunting question for about three years now. Still haven't found a definite answer. Come Valentine's Day, I hope to have an answer...(just naming a holiday in the distant future).

Okay, enough of this utter nonsense. Off to study!

Hey all. Sorry for the lack of updates... I usually write utter randomness in my Xanga, so if you want to keep up with me, should this blog prove inadequate, you can visit my Xanga here: click me! Generally, I keep well-thought-out entries on this blog here and the randomness on the Xanga... you know, the "I'm bored/hungry/tired" type entries. :)

So today was awfully cold... right now, I'm standing with my tshirt, pajama pants, AND my really super long (and obese) scarf from Forever 21. It is quiet warm, except I am in need of gloves. My hands are so dry and chapped from the coldness... -_- More lotion-slathering time, eh? I hate putting on lotion... it gets everywhere, it takes awhile to soak in the skin, and I always forget to put on lotion.

Tonight was the annual Veteran's Day concert... a salute to all of our veterans. Mr. Barney spoke, yay, that was nice... I'm so used to hearing him speak in class, but in an environment like at the church with all these veterans, it felt different... anyway, he's a really nice guy. I played the Stars and Stripe piccolo part with Janki and Christina... that went pretty well, considering I haven't practiced this but four times since last year... I still remember how to play all of that piece!!! And most of the other pieces by memory since we played them so many times last year. You know, if I don't start using earplugs soon, I'm going to be deaf by 25... those piccolos are shrill!

Anyway, off to conquer so more unfinished homework. For those that I usually visit: sorry my visits have been so sporadic/few =( I hate my life right now, well, the workload, anyway... or maybe I just work too hard.

Just finished: The Sterkarm Handshake by Susan Price (nice!)
Currently reading: Henry and Clara by Thomas Mallon.

I'm so sleepy...

Earlier, I was doing homework on my bed (yes, I know, not a smart move) ... and I decided to lay my head down for just a little bit when... I woke up 5 hours later.

... Ok, not really, but it's happened before. Thank goodness it wasn't today :) I have a Trig test tomorrow.

94 ON INCLASS ESSAY! THANK GOODNESS...after the last one, I could have sworn I got another mid-B. It has gotten to the point where I take any A, no matter how high or low, in AP Lit... see, I used to hate grades like 91, but now, I treat it like it's a 99 or something... whoohoo. School is kicking my butt (physically - my health is so bad right now... I've gotten two-three illnesses or so this past month). Plus, more "bad" grades are filtering in this year... for example, I've gotten more Cs than I have ever gotten in my schooling career up to this point. Minor grades, but still... when a big red 70 is smack dab in the middle of your paper, it hurts.

So Bush won four more years... I have mixed feelings about this, and I'm sure the rest of America does, too. I hope that during the next four years, he takes steps to bring the country together because looking at the election, we're so deeply split. Kerry's right - we need unity. Hello, the United States of America... I have a lot of friends that are leaning more Democratic, and all this "Bush sucks" talk makes me wonder. Whether you hate him or not, we're stuck with him for another four years. Something interesting I learned in U.S. History - Look at Abraham Lincoln. whom we consider a great president today... he was not popular with the people--he didn't even have friends in the White House-- for the most part, until the turning points of the Civil War. That's weird - not knowing the politics of the Civil War, I always thought that everyone loved Lincoln, but no, that wasn't true. Yet look how he is portrayed now. o_O I wonder how Bush will go down in history. How will I explain him to my kids? Hopefully not using all the derogatory statements that my friends used. He has his good points and his bad points, just like you and me.

"Do you have a boyfriend?" This question, not a common question to begin with, was asked to me not once, but twice yesterday, by two different people. No, they weren't guys who were looking for a girl, and no, the females who asked me weren't lesbian/bi (cough, Ellen Y)... one of my good friends and one of my teachers I had last year were the ones who asked me. I just found that so weird that such a question of great personal weight would be brought up twice in one single day. My personal life is pretty...interesting. Well. I have some reasons why I don't have a boyfriend right now, but sometimes, that inner girl breaks loose from its cage and takes over my emotions and thoughts. I just wish I won't do or say something stupid like I did last time and regret it for years to come. Hey, but you know what they say: you learn by doing ... (like, committing mistakes?) -_-

Dust to Dust ... what the?

Today, I took a day off from school to see Dr. Lin... I've been having problems with my lower back (my parents suspected kidney problems :/), and the last trip to the doctor didn't cure it all the way, so this morning, I went yet again... Dr. Lin is a really nice man :) After doing the usual diagnosis, I even got some acupuncture in ^_^ This was my first time ever, and I always imagined tons of scary pins and needles... but in reality, it wasn't that bad. Just some points of pressure and some pricklyness. I believe getting shots are worse :P I don't know if the acupuncture helped, though... I don't know the science behind it, but hey, if it's been used for thousands of years...

I just read Danielle Steel's book The Promise because Betsy lent it to me... :) I wrote a review on it in Amazon, if you care to read... not one of my better reviews because I'm kind of sick and tired, but it will do, hopefully. One thing, though... I really hope all of her books aren't like that... somewhat bland, flat, predictable... hopefully not to the predicability of Nicholas Sparks =\ Now wouldn't that be a shame...

Well, this week has been HOMECOMING WEEK, and of course, all the days have something funky to it... Tuesday, I dressed up as twins with Ning-Fei and Dina (JAPANESE SCHOOL GIRL OUTFITS + HAIR ...), Thursday, I dressed like a tomboy with my dad's shirt and my cap... whoohoo, "sexy!" I got lots of compliments, which was nice... EDIT: HERE ARE SOME PICTURES... Click on them to view the full size...





Twin Day. I dressed up like Ning-Fei and Dina. We looked like Japanese school girls...

Katherine and me as guys... :D

Why do I have such a bad phobia of phones? Whenever I am seized by the urge to call ________, I shrink away from fear and I never end up dialing _________, letting what could possibly be a golden opportunity of friendship to pass yet again. Even with girl friends, I can't bring myself to call... what's wrong with me? Am I just not concise with speaking or communicating my thoughts? Perhaps it's because I'm too afraid something will slip out that shouldn't... Oftentimes, I ramble, and sometimes, those thoughts aren't what I want people to hear, no matter how close I am with them.

Sorry so short, this entry is mainly just to let you faithful know that I'm still alive. :)

guess what... my wireless keyboard has died... i'm assuming it's the batteries, so i'm using my regular keyboard on the laptop... and it sucks. i don't have the shift key, enter, or backspace to use... so if i mess up, please forgive me. i have to manually right click and do delete or make it a space... so it's really annoying and aggravating. i'll have to fix my keyboard later... oh wait, since i don't have the enter key, i can't make paragraphs nor use html... oops... well, anyway, i'm just letting you know about my predicament. i'll blog a proper entry later. insert smiley face here...

I woke up at 2p.m. today. Yeah, I'm not sleeping at 2am anymore just for the heck of it :) I was engaged in interesting IM conversations last night, and unfortunately, that preceded sleep (right Kevin? Ahaha) ... I suppose it was one of those once-every-now-and-then moments.

Anyway, this past week, I've been spending my days in Atlanta (whooohooo) ... all we did was shop, haha. We whizzed through three malls (THREE!), and that was probably equivalent to 10+ miles of walking, hahaha... I bought some gifts, pants from Gap ($10), and a shirt from Aero ($6) ... yeah, I'm cheap. I usually don't buy clothing over $10 ... I can show you how to get a wardrobe for less than $50, I'm sure ;)

As I toured though all the stores (there's many to choose from in Atlanta), a lot of the stores had their Christmas display already up. Geez, October isn't even over yet... and did we forget about Thanksgiving? I guess on the whole, Christmas outweighs a lot of holidays... well, I like Christmas, but what a way to inundate (hey I like that word) the shelves with red, green, and white... :) They're just after our pocketbooks, that's all. But I still can't wait for Christmas because then this emotionally aggravating ride of a first semester junior year will be OVER, and we'll have time to warm up by the fire, spending quality time with friends and family. :)

I was talking with my good friend Mike last night, and of course, we were reflecting over the past (I seem to do that a lot with him) ... I cannot believe how much stuff happens in one year because I didn't realize that until I was talking with him. My freshman prom? That was a little over a year ago. Merely a year...(May 2003) I feel like freshman year was aeons and aeons ago :\ but it wasn't. Also in May 2003, the current sophomores in college graduated from high school...what, I feel like they've been gone for years as well, not merely a little over a year. =\ I was flipping through my photo albums and the differences between this time last year and now are... great... Time plays a very cruel joke on us.

Fake 9/11 Silver Coins ...

This past week has been rather interesting... A brief outline of what has happened in Dani's life, for those of you that care (then again, if you didn't care, you wouldn't be here, right? :D)

Saturday - Dina and her family came over, and we hung out at my house--bonding time!--, and around 4pm or so Howard came down from Duke University to visit our wonderful city of ________ (cough cough) ... :D x 1000 I was pretty elated because I haven't seen him in over a year. After more hanging out at my house, Howard, Tiffany (my sister), and I crashed at Brian's house (who was home for the weekend as well). The boys and I watched part of the UGA vs. Tennesee game (UGA lost...).

For dinner, we ate out at Ruby Tuesday ... first time I've been to the Ruby Tuesday (and I've lived here for how long?), and of course I ate chicken >=) while Howard and I discussed about the wonderful thing known as our lives. What a roller coaster. After dinner, at the earnest pleading from my sister, we headed over to Wal-Mart :) Why, I'm not really sure. Howard and I ended up buying a 750 jigsaw puzzle, and its pieces still lay scattered on my bedroom floor. It is a really pretty puzzle called "Seaside Leap" with dolphins, a magnificent horizon, and of course, the wonderful creatures of the deep. I have about 30% completion, and at this rate, hopefully I'll finish this by Christmas... gracias, Howard.

Sunday - Chinese school... started a three day spree of eating pizza (darn you, Papa John's) ... tried to study like crazy but whatever. Ended up talking on the phone most of the time...

Monday - This is sad, I'm failing to remember what happened to me two days ago... I was a little peevish on Monday, don't know why "grrrr" -_- When I'm in a bad mood (which is often), it's not a pretty sight :D flute lessons... I have decided that I NEED TO PRACTICE... more than just 1 day a week -_- Howard came over and visited me while I was feverishly studying for tests... yay... :)

Tuesday - ... seriously, what happened yesterday? My memory is that bad.... I do remember doing yoga though...oh yes, and report cards :)

Wednesday - TODAY! ... Mrs. H basically told me, in a somewhat subtle way, that I had failed an AP practice... My God, I stink at AP Practices... also, I took the PSAT, and I think I missed some really silly questions... probably I rushed through them. Sigh. School sucks.

Okay, yeah, I'm not doing this again because this proves that my short-term memory is not so hot :) I barely remember what happened this morning. Isn't that sad? Well, just wanted to let you know that I'm still alive... and I will write a better entry later. :)

I'm currently reading Mine Eyes Have Seen by Ann Rinaldi (a really good historical fiction writer) ... and when I brought it to class the other day, my friend Jane said, "Oooh, new book, let me see..." and she and Ann Marie took a glance at the cover and simultaneously bursted out into the Battle Hymn of the Republic song... "Mine eyes have seen the glory of the coming of the Lord..." while of course everyone stared at them. IT WAS SO CUTE "like a musical!" hahaha... gosh, I love my friends.

Hmm, what else happened this week (it is, after all, Wednesday)... I got a 100 on an AP Chem test (yes!), the very one that I was on the verge of tears because I didn't understand how to do a lot of the problems the night before the test... got an 87 on a really easy Spanish test (what the heck... I bet that just killed my average), and totally failed an in-class essay today about the oh-so-wonderful, extraordinary, amazing Billy Budd ... no seriously, there is absolutely no sarcasm here, none at all.... -_-

For those that I usually visit (you know who you are), I will pay you a visit very soon, I'm so sorry for not givin' some loving to you wonderful people :( ... hopefully when this crazy week is over, I'll stop by your wonderful blogs.

I can't believe I've been through 9 weeks of hell (sorry, no other word to describe) already... only three more of these 9-weeks periods left... guess who's ready for Christmas, actually? ^.~ Fall's pretty, and there are some good perks about it (really nice weather, etc.) but it's also hard/long/boring schoolwise. Seeing some Christmas merchandise already on sale (!!!!!!!!! Halloween hasn't even passed yet), I'm already in the mood for some fireside warming, some lovin' (hahaha yeah right, not moi!), exchanging warm-hearted gifts, hitting the mountains (or if you're like my family, the beach in the winter XD...), and consuming unhealthy amounts of sugar-enhanced milk chocolate. Sigh... how blissful.

It's late...

I should be in bed...

The one day when I had little to no homework, I still stay up around 11pm.... ^_^ I think I've gotten so accustomed to sleeping at this (unhealthy) time that any other time would throw off my sleep schedule. Not good! No wonder I sleep until 1pm on weekends... :)

Quick post, sorry. Off to bed.

I spend my evenings studying, studying, and studying, and of course, last night I found myself sleeping at 12:30a.m.... cramming for an AP Chem. test. Of course, my fellow friends were online as well (why do people stay online so late? sigh... we all need like, 8 hours of sleep) See, if I didn't do all those practice problems this past weekend, I would have failed the test today like none other... this goes to show that Practice makes perfect.......but I wish I had more time to, say, practice my flute ^_^ At this rate, I'm never going to make All-State Band...

Well, off to do debate work. How exciting! See, our pitiful class is directly after one of the best classes to breeze through LHS... we pale in comparison to the brilliant people of the class of 2005 :P so there's some pressure on us (06!) to do just as well... but I'm not super geniuses like they are. :)

Gosh, my emotional roller coaster ride (har! trig project...) has been hitting some bumps and some really steep hills... -_- Sigh, I think my hormonal levels must be imbalanced and I need some medication. Either that, or my emotions are trying to tell me that something's up. See, on my trig project, I was going to name my roller coaster ride "Only to Fall Again," but I changed it...

This morning, I woke up scared for my life...I woke up breathing heavily and gladly taking my surroundings in--yes, I'm still alive, and yes, I'm still in the comforts of my own room. I dreamt about my friend and me, and she and I, for some reason, devised a plot... and I remember seeing her with a revolver/gun and shooting and killing these people, people that were our friends (in band?), one by one, until she suddenly stopped at this one person, and she fled. I remember seeing the bodies crumple... I had a revolver too, so I think I dropped it and ran... where I ran and hid, I don't remember. I just remember feeling really scared for my life, and how eventually people would know it was my friend (let's call her Katie) who commited those heinous acts, and I was somehow tied in with her... I think I was trying to hide the evidence (the gun) and also praying that nobody would know that I knew about the plot, and that I actually had a gun in my possession... I was debating on whether I should tell someone of higher authority (teacher?) that I knew it was her and I was involved, too, although I didn't technically do anything...it was terrifying being in that position, and sadly, I have felt this way before. I'm sure everyone's been in that position, although perhaps not as drastic...

I went shopping this weekend. Dillard's was cleaning out its summer stuff... see, the best time to shop is when it's the transition of seasons because stores throw out their stuff at cheap prices... good for you, the shopper. :) I bought this really pretty pink, flowery dress for only $4 (regular price must have been $30 or so)... and some other articles of clothing for cheap prices. I'm content, I guess. Well, I'm not the type of person to be thrilled or ecstatic about buying clothes, unlike some people.

Yeah, to try to boost my mood, I exercised today for about 30 minutes... my mood was temporarily boosted, but now, I'm all depressed/tired/lazy/mmmmphhh again. :( How does one cheer oneself up? I don't think I'll be truly happy until Christmas (well, December)... in two months. I don't even really know why I'm so depressed/down all the time because there's really no good reason. This is weird because last year, fall 2003, my journal entries tell me that I was a happy-go-lucky sophomore... just having the time of my life despite my ups and downs. This year, I feel like I've been sapped of all emotion/energy... and all I am left to deal with is apathy and the ocassional bitter cynicism.